I’m usually not one to get all lovey dovey, but I guess with Valentine’s Day and it being the first one for us as a married couple, the love bug struck! I wanted to share how my husband and I met, and how I knew he was the one!
All through high school and college, I casually dated. I had one serious relationship in college that didn’t end too well… I broke up with him right before our trip to Hawaii (crazy, I know!) But I had just turned 21 and may have hit the party scene a little too hard, so I wanted to be free. I still in a round about way see him and I am so happy things ended up how they did. I firmly believe everything happens for a reason.
So I stayed single for a while throughout college, I dated here and there but nothing very serious. I think at 25 my mind kind of shifted where I realized I was ready to find someone and be in a committed relationship. Some of my friends were starting to be and get married, so it felt like it was the right timing. Another thing about dating – I think it’s all about timing. You have to be okay with yourself and in the right mindset to find someone and have a lasting relationship. Trust me, I’m not expert, but that’s what seemed to be the case for me.
I’ve had a few friends try online dating. I feel so old when I say this, but online dating was just becoming a thing the last year or so, but I wasn’t all about it. I didn’t like the idea too much, I was meeting people by going out to bars and clubs, but always ended up being the wrong type of people. I was seeing this guy for a little bit, but it was long distance and wasn’t going to work so when we broke things off, my friend Sarah told me I needed to give Match.com a shot. Over some wine, we created my profile.
Honestly to this day I don’t remember much of what we wrote or what pictures I put on there, but it seemed to have worked ha! I started talking to a few guys right off the bat. I remember going through and “liking” or “winking” at profiles trying to find a good match. Definitely had to weave through the pack a little bit. I started talking to this one guy who almost instantly asked me out. I said yes – why not at this point and we went to dinner and drinks. If I recall I think he came and picked me up in an Uber, why I gave him my address without knowing him at all, yeah…dumb move. Either way, he came and picked me up and we went downtown for dinner. I remember meeting him and thinking he didn’t look exactly like his picture, but here goes nothing…
All through dinner he talked about his ex-girlfriend. I learned he was with her for 7 years and recently broke up a few months ago. She was exotic looking, tall and had dreadlocks. The complete opposite of me! We finished up dinner and then went to another bar to get a drink. Not sure why I stayed, but I did. Things just got bad to worse from that point. I ended up leaving later that night and got my own Uber home. The next day I woke up to text messages from him. I didn’t want to be rude so I responded. Then they kept coming ALL DAY LONG. Listen, I don’t want to be ghosted by anyone, but being a clinger may be even worse. At the end of the day it was just all too much. I politely told him I wasn’t interested in seeing him again and that was that.
Travis (my now husband) and I started messaging on Match.com shortly after my horrendous first Match.com date. I believe he messaged me first. I actually have all the emails saved, I could go back and check ha! We had a bunch in common – both from the Scottsdale, AZ area, went to ASU and he was only about two years older than me. For almost a month we emailed back and forth. Long winded emails, but it was a nice chance to get to know one another before actually meeting up face to face. At one point though I was like alright enough is enough… when is he going to ask me out?! We ended up talking on the phone one night and had some good conversation. And then he finally asked me out. We ended up going to dinner at this trendy spot in Phoenix. I was so nervous. It’s so awkward when you meet someone for the first time – I was panicked I wouldn’t know what he looked like or wouldn’t know how to be. I was on the phone with my friend Sarah while standing in the parking lot waiting for Travis to show up. He literally walked by me as I was talking on the phone freaking out about this date. I felt so awkward, I ducked behind a car even though he had most certainly seen me. I hung up with Sarah and proceeded to enter the restaurant.
It was a busy place! Travis was in the front and when I walked in and we saw each other, he gave me a handshake. I still to this day tease him about it. Who does that?! It’s not a business lunch, it’s a date! I was so embarrassed, but I guess it worked out 😉 We then got seated and dinner. I don’t remember too much of what we spoke about, but it went well and then he asked me if I wanted to go see some live music. He was paying attention – I spoke about how I love live music! We went to this little dive bar that had live jazz music around the corner. I’m not a huge jazz person, but it was so fun! I always try to follow Patti Stanger’s advice (Who Wants to Date a Millionaire) and have only two drinks on a date. I think I may have had three, but it was within a few hours.
We talked some more, watched the band and had a good time. Kind of from there the rest is history! We started seeing each other a couple times a week, nothing too serious. But before I knew it I was falling for this guy. He was so nice and caring and we had so much fun together. About a month into seeing each other, Travis won a work trip to San Antonio, TX. I had never been on a vacation with someone I was dating before and it was going to be after only dating a couple of months, but I said yes and I am glad I did!
Travis and I both agree that on that trip is when we realized we had fallen for one another. Probably me more than him! I was surprised he didn’t run for the hills… On the way there our flight got derailed and we had to land about an hour away, wait for the storm to pass and then go to San Antonio. I hate flying let me tell you, especially the take off and landing. And we had to do it two more times along with being in bad weather. I tried to maintain composer, but it was hard. Travis held my hand through it and we made it safely to San Antonio.
The trip was so fun! We did different excursions his work set up for us. From wine tasting to a motivational speaker it was a good time. We ended up staying an extra two nights in San Antonio and went to this cute little boutique hotel downtown. We went to a fancy dinner and Travis ended up buying last minute tickets to see the Doubie Brothers. It was an amazing time. Unfortunately the last day of the trip, I started to feel sick. When I am sick, I’m not the nicest person and easiest to deal with. Certainly not a good look when you just start dating someone. Travis again, was so sweet and dealt with my sickness and all. It was from that point on that I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.
Sorry so cheesy and long winded, but I am a big advocate for online dating. I think it works wonders! Even though Travis and I grew up in neighboring towns and went to the same college, who knows if we would have met otherwise? Happy Valentine’s Day everyone!